


Not Every Victory Needs to be Celebrated

by KathPetrovaDiary



Series: F1 2018 Season [3]
Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety Attacks, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Panic Attacks, bahrain GP 2018, simi - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-09
Updated: 2018-04-09
Packaged: 2019-04-20 16:49:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 696
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14265405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KathPetrovaDiary/pseuds/KathPetrovaDiary
Summary: Kimi feels guilty after running over his mechanic during the Bahrain GP which leads to a panic attack.Luckily, Sebastian's there to provide comfort.Set Bahrain GP 2018





	Not Every Victory Needs to be Celebrated

**Author's Note:**

  * For [CustardCreamies](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CustardCreamies/gifts).



> On my last fic: In My Blood CustardCreamies commented, wondering if I could write a Simi fic involving anxiety/panic attacks.  
> I planned on doing this a long time ago, but only now with the stress that was the Bahrain GP I found the courage to actually write it.
> 
> I hope you like it, sweetie <3

The door flies open. Kimi doesn’t look up as he knows exactly who’s entering the room. 

“Kimi! Did you catch those last few laps? Oh my God, I was faking it so much! They were dead, legit gone! Val would have passed me if it had been one more lap. I can’t believe Lewis didn’t catch up either, like his tires were so much fresher.” Sebastian continues to talk while putting down his belongings but Kimi doesn’t pay any mind to it.  
To him the excited babbling of his teammate is nothing more than white nose in the background. 

He is focused on one thing only. His mechanic. He feels guilty. Regrets pressing the pedal down. If he’d waited, nothing would have happened. Of course, he couldn’t have done anything about it. Like he’d said to the press. ‘When the lights go green, I drive.’ That is his only task. Still, he can’t shake the feeling he is responsible for Francesco’s broken leg.

Kimi stares straight ahead, hands clasped so firmly together that his knuckles see white. What if Francesco never recovers? He’s been with Ferrari for over a decade. He lives and breathes the team. What if he ruined the man and his family’s life?  
His breathing becomes more and more rapid as sweat begins to trickle down the sides of his face.  
He closes his eyes, trying to picture anything but the accident. It doesn’t do him any good. The hateful comments swim through his mind. His own fans calling him cold, heartless,… Everything he isn’t.  
The world sees him only as the Iceman. While he has accepted that role, it’s far from who he is. Maybe in front of the camera but not behind the scenes. He gets as easily frustrated as Sebastian, can be as hot-headed as Fernando, can complain as much as Lewis.  
Especially now that he has had another DNF. Why isn’t he allowed to be alone and think about it before the press wants a half-heartedly response out of him.  
He doesn’t realize that a small whine escapes his lips as he presses his hands against his forehead, trying to calm himself.  
It is then that Sebastian notices something’s wrong.

“Kimi?” The German’s face falls at the signs of discomfort on his teammate’s features. The second he recognizes the signs of a panic attack, he drops everything he’s holding. The cap and sunglasses clatter to the ground but he doesn’t care. He kneals next to Kimi on the floor, rubbing his back soothingly. “Hey, Kimi. Breath, schatz. Breath.”  
Sebastian pries Kimi’s hands away from his face before rubbing his thumb over the soft skin of the back of his hand. The tension visibly lessens in his lover the longer he continues the movements. He sits besides him, whispering words of comfort until the Finn’s ready to speak. His own celebrations are forgotten. His only concern now is taking care of Kimi. Sebastian doesn’t need to know what caused the attack specifically. If Kimi wants to tell him, he will listen. Right now, he is happy with comforting him.

At a given point, Sebastian rests his head on the blond’s shoulder. He feels Kimi lay his own on top of his and smiles to himself. It would all be alright soon.

Kimi takes in another deep breath as he relaxes against Sebastian. He grabs the German’s hand in his, giving it a small reassuring squeeze. “Thank you.” He can always count on Sebastian. Now, he just wants everything to go back to normal.  
“Congrats on your win. You drove wonderfully.” He changes the subject as he glances down at his boyfriend. “Sorry we didn’t celebrate it the usual way.”  
At that Sebastian sits up, making eye-contact with Kimi. “Not every victory needs to be celebrated.” The bright blue of his eyes intensified by pure love takes Kimi’s breath away. He can’t imagine what he’d do without Sebastian. “As long as I have you, I’m the happiest man alive. Trophy or no trophy.” Sebasitan leans in to kiss the Finn softly, grinning when he feels the man kissing him back slightly more passionate. Yeah, Kimi would definitely be alright.

The End

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading. Kudos and comments are always welcome <3


End file.
